Monday 3 October 2011

skeleton ghosts

skeleton ghosts

i look at the page
a skeleton of age
yet whilst i look at the bones
and the deep sunken eyes
i feel strictly disowned
I feel lost and despised
but that self that i was
with no manner of thighs
lingers still like a ghost
(at the back of my soul)
rips me up spits me out
but it makes me back whole

drunken sex,
forgotton nights
they can cover it up
they can hold me
and breathe me
and make me feel loved
but i still cant
decieve me
i cant cover the rut
when i see skeletons still breathing
i feel fearful mistrust

and all i want is to see me
but i still cant adjust
all i want is believe me
to trust love, not just lust
and i'm looking for closure
for some calm and some peace
and i want it to leave me
give me some kind of release

looking back at those ghosts
on the page full of sad
i feel honestly angry
Heartbroken and MAD

this heartbreaking anger
it waits then it posts
me home to the future
then snoozes til almost

..forgotton in me

...again i feel almost

i feel almost free

until the day i stumble
and fall by a mirror
on my ghosts image, i mumble
at which point anger and fear
in a cycle decending ..(yet jumbled)
reappear..
which seems frankly never ending
but i shall keep just pretending ..(in jest)

untill i can lay that old ghost down to rest

Saturday 1 October 2011

words untrue

a Lie is made of words untrue
created only to defuse
a situation unknown just now
a creation to tell me how
you didnt do it..
you didnt say it
it wasnt you who
Made it
or Inflated
your very own ego, says
your Far to clever
..to be caught
you make it new
lies can be taught..
in your own head, to be true
Anticipate it.
but from this lie we're through
You'll comiserate its
telling, only you
will know what caused this route
now yelling..
dream we're not through
the dreams happy,
we start a new

but its not true..

this lie.. is through